Who is ? Miss Carmela!
- Get out of my room immediately! - Right away !
The pants.
- But this room is mine! - What happened to me?
- Why am I here? - Are you asking me? I slept it.
Me too ! God, I'm compromised! What did I do?
Calm down, if she hasn't compromised you the slap, nothing else happened.
I have to go home right away.
- Toto, what happened? - Nothing, I had a nightmare.
- I fell out of bed. - Did you get hurt?
No!
- Wait, I'll accompany you. - Leave me alone.
It's dangerous there, they see you!
- Would you go to the Moon? - Yes, I'm not afraid of anything!
Look, a Martian! I saw him go by!
A ghost on the roof!
A female ghost!
My goodness, how scary!
Toto, have you seen her?
It's true, first he went to that one leaves and then he flew this way!
Bice, wake up!
Wake up!
- Bice! - Carmela, what is it?
- I thought it was Douglas. - Leave your Douglas alone.
A terrible thing happened to me, I've been in a man's bed.
-Who was he? - Toto, that rude driver.
Madonna! On the eve of yours wedding! What did you do?
I don't know, I was sleeping. I was in the bed with him, but I was sleeping, you know?
How to sleep at such a time?
- Carmela, are you sleepwalking? - I'm afraid so.
-Toto, what was he like? -He had the body like a child and the face of an old woman.
- All toothless! -She left even a smell of sulfur!
She had the exhaust open!
The lonely girls! Carmela, Bice!
Dad is coming!
My little ones! Carmela, don't worry, dad is here!
Has anyone come in? Did they do something to you?
They were scary to my baby doll?
- Nobody did anything to me. - We were sleeping.
They woke you up! They disturbed you! I'll take care of it!
- Dad, please go to bed! - Everyone must mutiny!
- Forget it, dad! - Everyone must mutiny!
What will happen now?
It was a scary ghost!
Enough ! When I sleep, this The square is an area of ​​silence!
- A ghost passed by! - Where ? Make him come here.
Shut up, now Don Arcangelo, he sticks it with his sword!
I'm not a sissy like you and I don't believe in ghosts!
Hurt because this ghost exists !
He doesn't look for girls, but brave people.
-Maybe he broke into your house. - Are you teasing me?
Never, but I advise you to keep the stock handy!
If he finds you without a rapier, do you remain like a stockfish?
Shut up! Be quiet!
Silence, otherwise the "mammasantissima" stings us!
You're forgetting that I made all of Naples tremble
and now unconsciously you're playing with fire!
Be careful not to cook yourself!
You have to tell me these things when I'm wearing a shirt,
so my whole tie is shaking!
Hey ! Go to sleep!
Otherwise I'll get my money back and I won't make you party anymore!
Don't argue with that ignorant person!
Greetings, Don Arcà! Good night !
Goodnight, then let's do the math!
- Dad, stop it! - You are right, I lose my dignity.
Go to bed and don't be afraid, Dad's there for anything.
Give me a kiss.
This is for Bice. I'll show him the ghost!
The ghost doesn't know me!
Bice, I'm sleepwalking. How can I get married in this state?
- You will need to see a doctor. -He can heal me!
No, but at least it will give you a cure.
What a scandal! Let's hope so at least that they didn't recognize me.
Bice, can you hear that noise? Let's hope so.
- Miss Carmela, you too do you play the ghost? - Yes, certainly.
I affirm and reconfirm that the ghost is 59!
This, the ancient grimace, the Gospel of all grimaces,
says the male ghost is 59
and respectfully speaking, the female ghost is 12!
Don Peppino, in the Atomic Age
you raise the question again of ghost sex!
Ghosts are neutral! Male o females always make 59!
- We thank God! - If tonight is the event repeated and they see you?
- Dishonor is 81! - Let's hope so no! Otherwise I'll kill myself.
Your girlfriend, attitude.
Baroness Matilde and Prospero.
- Hello, Carmela. - Hello, Prospero.
- Good morning, Baroness. - Good morning, did you sleep well?
- Enough. - Well done, at the wedding you need to arrive rested and fresh.
My Prospero is always like this agitated ! Right, Prospero?
- Yes, mom. I should say something. - No! This morning no "things".
Right dear? Let's go and see today the bedroom?
I really today... we won't be able to go and see her tomorrow?
- We're going to the doctor. - To the doctor?
From a Doctor of Law.
Now your degree you can put it in the attic.
- We'll talk about it again, Baroness. - All right, dear.
- Prospero! - Yes, mother?
She says goodbye and goes home right away!
Carmela, I have to tell you something!
Prospero, another time. Sorry, the bus is leaving.
- See you tonight, bye. - But I'm on quills!
Miss Bice, there's mail from England for you!
Take. Your boyfriend never sends old stamps!
- What do you want to do? - Until we meet again.
Good morning, little baron, what number can I give you?
- How much is "serious situation"? - 27.
- And "imminent marriage"? - 73.
- Can I recommend a number? - Say.
- 34 "courageous initiative". - It's a word!
It's a difficult number! I've tried to play it many times!
Try it again, who knows, maybe the tern will come out!
- Let's try. I wish it were! - Good.
How delicate is my Douglas! The English!
He's been keeping you cool for 3 years! When he comes here to marry you?
- You southerners don't understand! - Of course, you're from the north!
I was born here by mistake, I am tired of this blue sea,
of this ancient incivility. Ah, the fog! The smog!
Bice, he's here. Until he leaves, I'm not going there.
200 the Amalfi coast! Panoramas and songs included in the price!
Take a seat on the bus! Panorama? Numbered seats!
Standing or sitting the price is the same!
Take a seat on the bus of all nations
where the language is spoken international, pure Neapolitan.
Enjoy the sea and the sun of Amalfi.
Please, mister, look at how much it is nice and don't laugh your ass off.
Don't have money? But you have cigarettes. Please take a seat.
- My friend? - Even your friend?
Just a cigar? Come on, let's do it for Italian-English friendship!
Can I subscribe with this?
1000 lire glasses? Subscribed for 4 days!
Come on our bus, the most beautiful on the coast.
He's leaving! Why don't you come up? Does our bus stink?
I do not understand ! To Don Arcangelo it is it cost a lot and people don't go up!
"Coach reserved for sick people contagious."
Hold it and I'm going to remove it the sign.
- We're leaving right away! - Guagliaò, I have to say a few words to you.
At your disposal, what do you need?
- Say. - I renew the offer for the bus.
One hundred thousand notes, you take them and leave!
You have a beautiful coach, What do you do with this leftover?
I'm only interested in your license.
This residue I can throw it into the sea!
When the stranger see this rubbish,
what do you think of my Italy?
To the foreigner I like this crap.
You are wrong, tourists like it the ancient, the folklore
and he also likes the bus waste.
The tourist must want what I want! I'm in charge!
The owner is Don Arcangelo!
Sorry, Don Arcà.
Son of a single mother! You slaved me over for years!
You resurrected your license father just to spite me!
Don Arcangelo tells you! To you and your partner!
I will destroy you both!
What happened, dad? Calm down.
- What does my beautiful doll want? - That makes her happy.
Postpone the wedding for 10 days.
How is it done? It's all prepared for the feast of Saint Carmela.
- Dad... - Women's things, dad.
All right, Don Arcangelo for yours doll even moves the calendar.
- Thanks, dad. - We're going in Sorrento, the kit is half done.
- Will you give us a few cents? - I count the lire with zeros!
What do you need?
Go to Sorrento, buy the whole country and bring it here!
Here you are ! Bice, don't forget the rest!
- What happened? No water? - There is water, the engine is missing.
- Gentlemen, we have stopped... - Because the bus broke down.
I want to show you one of the locations most interesting in the area.
Here. the ancient Romans, they wanted to found a city.
How is this possible? Here there is only countryside!
Exactly, they saw the countryside and they didn't want to build it anymore.
It's far to get there, they're missing the means, there is no water, no electricity.
So they no longer founded it.
We missed these too!
Toto, we need a candle.
Find two, one also for San Gennaro.
- What's the name of this place ? - Falling boulders.
- Falling boulders? - From the Latin "massica denti",
which means: falling rocks.
It is much older than Pompeii, much more historical.
Here the Roman emperors they came there to spend the summer.
- Not nice here. - It's true, it's not very nice.
But no one passes by, it's a quiet place.
Emperors could walk without the hassle of people
who asked for autographs, signatures, supplications, alms.
Please take a seat. Get out to stretch your legs a bit.
This way... we are more calm.
How this place has become!
Right here, second the master plan at the time,
the Colosseum was to be built.
A small Colosseum, that was enough for the holidays of the emperors.
Yes, because they didn't build it. I have to invent this too.
They didn't build it because here A certain Ercole lived above it.
A young, robust man
that he didn't want to hear from everyone the days the builders under the house.
First he started throwing pebbles, just to disturb.
Then, one day she got angry, and he caught some large falling rocks
and he threw them down and killed them all.
Hence the name: Falling boulders.
- Because on my guide isn't it written? - Can I see?
He's an English guide, not theirs they know everything we know.
They canceled it because all the tourists who came here
they took a piece with them of falling boulder as a souvenir
and there was nothing left here. This is the reason.
Feel free to take photos, but don't touch them nothing or you'll get me in trouble.
I thought the bus was broken.
Instead... just like that.
Toto, finally the stagecoach broke down!
I'll let her rest because it is still in progress.
- Greetings, lawyer. - Have a good rest!
She gets on my nerves with that look of safety.
We're ready, we can go.
- What was wrong with him? - All !
She said she had candles dirty, the oil pan broken
and the clutch is worn out. As soon as we arrive, I'll take it to the mechanic.
You have to take it to the Wizard of Naples!
One moment, be patient, he's leaving now. It's character.
-He can't do it. - Did you remove the handbrake?
I took it out of the garage!
Go and see, if there was something...
- What did you load? - Antiquities Roman, good as souvenirs.
Falling boulders.
Damn anyone who makes me say it so much nonsense!
Doctor, without waking me up, at night I find myself...
the night is psychically dark.
Sincerely, miss, you are in love with her boyfriend?
The doctor is like the confessor.
Has she ever taken walks with him?
I don't have time for those stupid nonsense.
Prospero is a good boy and dad he is happy that you are marrying him.
I think above all to my career.
- Relax. What career? - The lawyer.
- Because she... - Yes and I'm proud of it.
- Relax. - Or rather, I was. With this disease... she will understand...
- A lawyer who goes to bed of others! - What's strange?
- She is a female lawyer. - Doctor !
Relax. Her case is clear, it is:
twilight inhibition of tropism of her subconscious.
-God, who is she? - Relax! Relax!
Her sister is very normal psychically.
For the rest I have never seen lawyers cases
which they offer with such grace.
The sleepwalker tries to do when she sleeps, when she is not conscious,
everything that is forbidden to him or which is prohibited in normal life.
- At that time ? - She is not satisfied of his too austere life,
full of studies and above all not she is satisfied with her boyfriend.
-Are you a sex maniac? - Relax! Relax!
Is it a contagious disease?
We sleep together and I wouldn't want to do that an injustice to my boyfriend.
Don't worry,
the illness concerns her sister, she is the patient!
There will be a cure, something...
Marriage helps a lot. You try to anticipate it.
Youth needs of these advances, do you understand me?
I understand, meanwhile for these days...
what if the phenomenon repeats?
- He will have to face a radical cure. - I'll deal with it.
It's necessary let me see this young man.
I have to decide which ring of conjunction exists between the two of you.
And what attracts her so much to him. Bring it to me here.
I don't want to deal with it with that!
Madam lawyer, she wants to become a real woman
- or remain just a lawyer? - I'll take care of it!
- I'll send him dead or alive! - Better alive!
Young man, Mr. Improta.
Who is ? Miss Bice, what an honor!
- I would like to ask you a favor. - For you everything you want.
- It's for my sister. -She is childishness and she can no longer speak?
No...
Then tell her to refuel of breath and use her beautiful voice.
-She wants to talk to you. - Okay, I'll talk to him.
This dress suits you best than the ghost one.
-Shut up, do you want to ruin me? - For goodness sake.
- Take a seat, Baroness. - I'm not yet.
- Temporarily as I can call ? - Lawyer or young lady.
- Do you prefer a prickly pear? - I can't stand vulgar foods.
And I'm the lawyers.
I am sorry, but today I am here as a lawyer.
- Whose ? - About myself.
I need to clarify the reports between you and a person
who he met tonight.
- Apart from you, I have not met Nobody. - Speak slowly!
I'm sick and I don't respond of what I do at night.
I suffer from twilight inhibitions as the medical certificate says.
Therefore she should go to be visited.
I did not understand. You are sick and do I have to go to the doctor?
Certain. The doctor, for the treatment, must find the connecting link.
I don't go to the doctor either when I'm personally sick
and I have to go there when they're sick the others?
It's a foreign disease who needs an interpreter?
It's not up to me, it is psychoanalysis that requires it.
I've got enough trouble of my own, I can't play sick for you.
- Then he wants scandal for everyone the costs? - What scandal?
You haven't done anything wrong, why do you call the truth a scandal?
It's the people who don't know how did things go!
Let him know!
I'm sorry, but I can't do it the hero for altruism. I have to work.
I understand ! As much as he wants to keep the secret?
- A thousand million, do you have it? - What speeches!
Then keep your money or I use the truth as I please.
Go ahead, but remember that I know the law, I have a father and a boyfriend
- who will be able to defend mine reputation. - I have to defend it.
If it becomes known that she has passed the night with me without harm
What do I look like?
Dear Baroness, this is why I am bothered to come to your house.
- What are 10 more days? - Let's postpone it by 20 too!
- Do you see? - Actually, I wanted to say something...
- Come on, say it! - Mom, it's a bit difficult...
Dear friend, in 10 days they can many things happen, you can die.
- Certain. - Or I can die, if you prefer.
- Priority to ladies. - I want to meet you.
Add 10 million to the dowry and I give you 10 days.
Donna Matilde, are we at the market? I ask you a favor and you...
I'll make you another one. You want that your daughter becomes noble?
Woh ! I'm always on the alert!
All right, done deal.
I have the right to nobility earned by the sweat of my brow.
Call it sweat! You were a fool in Naples!
- You were the holy mother of Healthcare. - I'm still proud of it.
With my value I was able to give the best education for my daughter.
Where do you put the honesty, the beauty of the girl?
I also had Prospero arrive pure at weddings!
- Mom, I wanted to say something. - Don't interrupt!
- Let him talk. - Prospero speaks only when I want.
Dad, I decided to get married right away.
- I bought a 10 day extension! - No extension, let's anticipate.
Prospero, I will be a good wife, I will always be faithful to you.
Of course, dear. But I have to tell you something!
- Later, young man. - Prospero, not now.
Since there was no addition of your 10 days...
it's right that I do it subtraction of my 10 million.
- Is it yours? - No, I bought it for you.
- Thank you, why? - We don't know where can you go tonight.
- From no one, I'll sleep tonight. - It's when you sleep that happens.
- I'll stay awake. - Then how shall we know if you are healed?
- So what should I do? - Wait. I'll show you.
Where did I put them? Where are the points?
With these under your feet... I want to see if you don't wake up!
With this system in a book Yellow they arrested the killer.
- I put them everywhere. - That's a good idea.
That's it. I'll watch over you, I definitely won't sleep with this!
Let's hope so.
Lawyer. Lawyer.
Miss Carmela... how does this one wake up?
Lawyer, you're back in my room. Lawyer.
Then you wake up and get me slapped, it's not nice.
Miss... Where am I going to sleep now?
Look what had to happen to me!
This is embezzlement of other people's beds!
Not bad!
On the contrary.
I better turn around.
I am good and good, but they are not made of wood.
Saint Anthony, only you can understand me.
How is it done? As ?
Of course it's hard work!
Are you sure?
The pins!
When you get to the Moon go like a pasha.
- Carmela! - Bice, let me sleep.
Get up, you're in that guy's room!
Even tonight!
- Stopped ! Don't turn around, I'm naked! - It's a cohabitation!
- Even the sister! - Don't take advantage of us!
I would like to take advantage of it only my bed.
She is insensitive! I'm here because my subconscious brings me!
You see that your subconscious she sleeps badly in his bed!
Come to the doctor and everything will be over!
How many of you are coming tomorrow? So I add some beds!
You come !
Run!
- I'm seeing double! - No, there are two ghosts!
Watch out for the pins!
Another apparition? Have you seen the ghost?
- We were sleeping. - With all this noise?
What is it that stings?
It was us, not to do enter the ghost.
Next one.
Good morning.
Everything got stained.
Pretty crucial, don't you think? Come in.
Doctor, it won't be dangerous this psychoanalysis?
It is dangerous not to resort to it!
Relax. Relax.
Relax.
Still.
More, more.
More than that...
- Relax. - I can do this even alone, look.
Now I'll say some words to you very simple
and she will respond with other words than by association of ideas
the words will call her back what I said. Clear ?
Let's try.
- Is he ready? - Ready.
- Bread ! - Bread.
- I'll say bread. - What should I say?
What by association of ideas he reminds her of the word bread.
Ah, bread! Bread...
- Wine. - Good.
Do you see the connection? Bread and wine. Here is the connecting link.
- Wine! - Bread.
- It's not very original, but in short... - Let's be satisfied.
To her, the wine only calls her back the word bread?
No, I can also say...
Waterfall ! Water and wine. It ruins the wine a little, but...
- Very. - But with a little soaked bread...
Try to get out of this loop vicious. Make an effort!
- Relax - Should I do this?
It's not necessary.
Let's see what I can ask you now.
Mozzarella!
Damn, that's hard mozzarella! Just mozzarella?
Bread and mozzarella! It's good bread and mozzarella!
It's not bad! But she says always bread! Always bread!
- Try hard, help me! - Without bread I don't know how to eat anything.
- Look at me. Bed ! - Sofia Loreo.
- Tank. - Sofia Loreo.
- Development. - Sofia Loreo.
- I said it: monofixity subcervicar. - Is it serious?
- Fixed idea. - I'm obsessed on a good idea, though.
Yes, but if you fixate on an idea he never abandons her again.
If she had the Loreo would she abandon him?
- No. But I don't have it. - Precisely.
Let's try with colors.
- White. - Snow.
- Well. Green ? - Lawn.
Well, do you see the connection? Green-meadow. The connecting link.
Sorry, what would the lawn be of these two?
- Why ? - When you look at them they look the same.
- Sky blue. - Napoli!
Go Naples, go pacifier, this year you are the king!
Red and black?
Nothing comes to me. What is red and black?
-Aren't you getting anything? Milan! - Milan, okay.
- Stupid. - Stupid...
Let's get heavy now.
Idiot... idiot.
Idiot.
- Imbecile. - You moron!
- Piezz'e cocozza. - Criminal!
- Criminal!
- Wild ! - You are a savage!
- Stormy! - I'll break your face!
You are there too! You sent me into a fight!
Stupendous ! What a temperament! What a character!
I found the connecting link!
What a wonderful couple of hyperthyroidism!
But what a couple! I came to her to find the cure!
Miss, now I have to tell you the truth.
Then adjust as you wish.
She needs a man who can my psychoanthopomorphic table
awarded in Brussels corresponds to type seventeen.
This young man is the type seventeen that she wants
into her subconscious during the night.
More or less I understood this too.
- But what should I do to get better? - I'll explain in plain English.
She has to consider that she is a pile which must be downloaded.
Therefore she needs contact.
The positive pole corresponds Mr. Improta here.
Ideal for an easy and safe healing
would be that the two types they mated.
The joining of the poles!
But if she rejects the ideal of her or another example also of type 17,
she will force her subconscious to an adaptation
repressing his impulses and therefore she will never recover.
There's no way out. At extreme poles, extreme remedies.
Okay, but there will be another one number that suits me anyway!
We could try the eighteenth, but it will definitely stay out of her way.
Psychoanalytically speaking. No, her type is seventeen.
It's obvious! The classic type of the simple, primitive boy,
healthy, without educational deformations, cultural, intellectualistic.
An ignorant. Remained in its natural state.
Of course the zest is not always nice, just look at it.
A normal, insignificant guy, in fact, I would say a little vulgar.
- Even animalistic! - Shall we start again?
However, in my precious table, I define the best.
That's exactly what she needs which is type thirty-one.
So I should choose a man common, vulgar and ignorant?
It's in both of our interests! Seventeen thirty-one...
Forty-eight.
This is what would happen between us, the forty-eight!
- Enough of this nonsense. - Is psychoanalysis nonsense?
She has to go with the guy seventeen !
She has to kiss him in full consciousness during the day!
He will see how good he will feel the night!
- Doctor, it's absurd! - The seventeenth in the thirty-first...
It's there once with a surplus of fourteen.
He can stay there as many times as he wants, but I'm not there even half the time.
I understood my cure, I will marry Prospero at once.
I don't know ! I don't know why you come to the doctor!
He makes me visit one and then he wants it mate with another!
Who is this Prospero? What type is he?
If I'm a seventeen type, at a rough guess it will be...
- A seven and a half. - A seven and a half?
Seven thirty with the crazy girl they look great.
You must be crazy and rude too!
- Can I go too? - If you want!
I hope you were joking with the kiss cure nonsense.
Psychoanalysis never jokes
It's a generation full of complexes.
- You saw a human figure. - A woman.
-The woman: 22. Was she beautiful? -Yes, she looked like you.
- Actually, it was you. - Really ? Thank you.
Beautiful woman: 44. And then?
Then I got closer to hug and kiss you.
But when I was about to hold you to me...
I was scared and so I only had you caressed the hand.
: And then ? Then...
mom woke me up and...
Missed hug: 68.
Here's the play: 22, 44, 68. They seem good to me.
We want to add the 34, courageous initiative?
- We need 50! Heroic gesture! - So I like you.
- Hello, Carmela. - I have to talk to you.
Come on, come on!
- Carmela where are you taking me? - I'll tell you now.
- Here you are ! - Carmela, I have to tell you something.
- Shut up and kiss me. - How?
Are you my boyfriend? After you !
Okay, I'll try.
No! I need a kiss like those in the cinema.
- They are my forte! - This is a little better.
- No, that's enough for today. - But how...
I'll show it to him! Does he think he alone has the mouth?
- What are you doing ? - It's an alarm signal!
I read it in a rotogravure. It's for thieves.
He should be tied to the door, instead you will tie it to your leg.
- So when you get up you wake up right away. - Well !
- I'm doing the kissing treatment with Prospero. - What if it doesn't work?
- It must work! - Anyway we are prepared for anything.
I would like to see the face he will make when he won't see me tonight.
Finally we see you! You made yourself wait!
I've been waiting since 10am!
If you wore braids, you looked Juliet waiting for Romeo.
Are you my Romeo, this time you're in trouble!
I finally understood how you do it to steal tourists from me!
It's unfair competition! Stuff jail! And I'll finish you there!
- Is my signature there? - There are witnesses!
Which witnesses? I know liars too.
Don Arcangelo Di Capua he has the law of him!
Capua Law. I could you destroy, but I don't.
He waits a moment.
This is my code, listen to me carefully.
That's 200 thousand lire for you. If I sell that little cart you have,
I'll still let you live otherwise...
With your lire I don't get much of a chance! I can come to meet you.
Let's become members!
You're a bastard, but you have the heart and the cheek!
Let's do this, you give me yours coach and then we can discuss it.
You know that mine it's a safe word!
Tested in Naples, surroundings and contours!
You know how I answer at your word?
- Attention, go back! - How?
- Be careful! - it? Be careful!
You want to suck my blood! Don Arcà, wake up!
It's no time to sleep!
I'd rather break everything!
Go away! It's better for everyone!
He's gone crazy! And I even waste my time!
They made me shake the whole rib!
- Stop, Carmela! - I'm already awake.
- Well, the signal worked. - It didn't work.
I really have to start the treatment with Toto.
And here was Naples.
We stopped here because it's one of the most beautiful points of the coast.
- One minute and we'll leave right away. - This time we won't leave again.
Great, then we have all the time to admire
one of the most beautiful views of the Amalfi coast.
A long time. Long time!
To make you enjoy it better, I will sing a beautiful Neapolitan song.
Instead of helping me fix the car, will you start singing?
Work, ignorant and pay attention to the rhyme.
In the clear sea there is a party and my passion tumbles there.
Look at the second candle on the right
which is always the same that frustrates us.
Except that the crossbow is broken.
It can flay you.
I bought it for him she didn't change it.
You want to finish it a little shabby.
I play the bundle and I'm leaving.
- You idiot, there's no rhyme. - I'm going anyway.
- Sorry, I should talk to you. - After that, now I'm busy.
At clear sea there was an idiot...
Pasqualino, continue, let them have fun. Take the guitar.
I have to fix the car and do I have to sing?
Give me the broom too, so I can clean on the ground! Can I buy you cigarettes?
We had a great escape tonight!
For tonight he proved a certain seriousness
I took the risk to come here.
- I'm ready to negotiate. - Always as a lawyer.
No, this time as sick.
I decided to do the treatment and if she's willing to kiss me,
I would like to start immediately.
Now ? Here?
I can't wait, my wedding is approaching
and I must heal at all costs.
You won't have mistaken me for someone pharmaceutical bottle?
I have never kissed out of care.
If an epidemic breaks out of sleepwalking
Am I a kisser for a living?
I understand, that it's not simple, but her it was ordered by the doctor.
I have to consider it like my medicine.
How would I ask the pharmacist...
what is the price for its performance?
See if I have the price on my shoulders and add the IGE.
Because you can't find each other another one of the same brand as me?
I'm not capable to do these things coldly.
I would...
if you weren't afraid of letting it be disclosed this story is so annoying.
Now I trust her.
All right.
Let's try to find a more suitable place.
Always in a medical sense, of course.
Take a seat.
It could be fine here, what do you think?
I'm not practical.
Do you allow? Otherwise the sun...
it bothers your eyes.
You prefer to keep your head to the right or to the left?
I think it suits me perfectly indifferent.
The nose sometimes...
- Do you still allow? - Yes, please.
So...
So shall we begin?
No, sorry, you would mind close your eyes?
It bothers me to be watched while... I work.
Thank you.
How do you feel?
I didn't feel any sensations.
This was a children's dose.
It was like the peck on the boob.
Each medicine has its own instructions, do we want to follow them?
This arm should go here. A little higher.
Tighten this around the waist.
Now is the right position.
She as number seventeen It's a little tight for me.
I didn't retire.
Now close your eyes and count mentally up to ten.
I'll take care of the rest.
- What happens ? - Nothing, It's windshield cancer.
You can't see us now.
I see, but nature gave me a physique unsuitable for my mentality
and glasses correct partly these defects of mine.
Lawyer, can I say something?
In my opinion nature has done more of her duty,
it's your mentality which is wrong.
It doesn't matter, I hope to be healed, thank you.
If you still need...
the doctor is like a missionary, he must sacrifice himself.
- I think there won't be any more need. - As you wish.
One moment.
One moment! They're in a hurry too!
I have to do everything in this house! One moment!
We're not in the emergency room! A little patience, I'm coming!
Good evening, are you Mr. Di Capra?
- You're welcome, Di Capua! - Sorry, yes.
- Are you Byce's father? - ...yes.
I understand ! You are related to Douglas!
I should have noticed it right away, the resemblance is perfect!
You look like two drops of water!
Water... dirty. My goodness, how ugly it is!
Please take a seat!
Who knows what a surprise for Bice!
Bice, come!
What does...Byce... mean in Italian.
I don't understand, come in!
Bice! Where will she stay?
- Yes ? - Come, there's a relative of Douglas!
Right now! A relative of Douglas, mother!
Your brother when she comes here?
- I wanted to explain, Mister Di Capra... - From Capua!
The marriage with Bice it is no longer possible.
How? Your brother he didn't have the courage...
I dare! I shot down 10 German devices!
Exactly, you knocked down 10 appliances, but your brother
he's a big bastard! Your brother!
I am my brother, Mr. Di Capra.
From Capua! With a "U" like this! Do you understand it in your country?
What does this story mean of the brother and not brother?
Very simple. lo, for small accident, I changed sex.
I became a woman.
But what? Who are you?
- I'm Douglas. - You are Douglas!
Are you Douglas? My Madonna! You're Douglas!
- What should have happened to me! - It happened to me.
Certainly not to me!
- Douglas's sister? - No, my daughter, no.
- The cousin? - No, you have to be strong.
- A disgrace! - There was misfortune... a change.
- Have you changed your mind? - No, dear. Mister The Goat...
Again with this goat! She changed...
Profession? Has he become poor? In short, what has changed?
Be strong, he has changed sex! This species of female is Douglas.
- Him? - Courage.
Stopped ! I forbid you to hug my daughter!
- Don't worry, I'm a woman now, Mr. Di Capra. - From Capua!
Get out of my house! Ex man!
Courage, we find another... another!
Listen to this.
"My love, I feel better than ever near you."
This is from April, they were the first symptoms.
This other one...
"My love for you has changed me. I'm becoming someone else."
He blames me too.
Poor Bice, You won't really sleep tonight.
You will understand, with all these memories!
Three years of correspondence! Coward... or rather, cowardly.
- All these men are scoundrels! - Is that a man?
I bother you what if I keep crying?
Don't worry, I'm so sleepy tonight!
Maybe it will be the new cure.
I also perfumed the biscuits. Better, they are more luxurious.
Five minutes to midnight! I don't have time!
How will they sleep with this thing?
Before going to bed one gets dressed!
Of course, they are intelligent! I, on the other hand, am animalistic.
Vulgar ! Okay, let's do what intelligent people do it.
We need a cigarette!
The book is better, it's more intelligent.
It's better that way.
What are you looking at? I read. I'm not sleepy, I read.
It wouldn't hurt to read Right back at you.
Then you get offended when they tell you that you are ignorant.
"Fry in a saucepan 100 grams of butter."
What book is it? "The king of chefs".
Okay, I'm waiting for a visit. I can wait for you
I am a young bachelor I have the right!
I'm not ugly. Don't listen to nonsense the doctor said.
I work all day, I'm just like a dog...
I'm 30 someday I'll have to think about it too.
Even when they set me up, you're screwed too.
"Fry 100 grams of butter..." Your wife will do it later!
Carmela, wake up.
Carmela, it's late. You slept all night.
All night?
Then I was cured!
- Oh my God, what a mess! - What's the matter?
Toto healed me and I dreamed about it all night!
I will no longer sleepwalk, but maybe I'm in love with him.
What unfortunates we are both!
A scoundrel has happened to you and to me a woman!
- You have to see it! - Are you crazy? Dad is in the square.
Yet I will find a system.
With all the space what's in the square
the nail had to end right in my tire!
This is no coincidence, who put it?
I do not know ! We have arrived on the streets with good tyres!
It will have been some son of a good mother!
This is an act of sabotage! This is sabotage!
Where are they going? Wait, we're leaving right away!
Wait a minute, where are you going? You are my property!
I know who it was! He even acts like a fool!
It's my fault! I owed it to you chase away from Amalfi!
- You stay here too! - What a brazen face!
You don't leave if first Don't fix my tire!
I don't care about your bus when he is healthy,
let alone when he is broken. Excuse me, tourists are late.
Don't leave, otherwise...
Don Arcà, I have a lot of respect for old age because I aspire to it too.
Try not to make me faint to my principles.
You threaten me! you know what I'm telling you? From this moment I declare war on you!
- Defend yourself! - We've had our fill!
What are you doing there? Get down, it's the enemy's camp!
Dad, I have to go to court.
That's my saboteur! Don't sabotage me too!
- Greetings, Don Antonio. - Your servant Don Arcangelo.
- They're all over there. - Close, from now on all beards are suspended.
I'll pay!
- Hello everyone. - At your orders.
I want to thank you because you have responded to my appeal immediately.
Don Arcà, after 20 years we are still here.
Thank you, I turned to you because you are the old guard.
Don Ciccio the water carrier, Licorice, Pasquale the professor,
Papete o'palic.
- You just have to command us. - Thank you.
Friends, this is how things are.
- They insulted me. - Who is this bastard?
- I'll eat it! - Listen to me.
Whoever has done an affront to you has it done to me too! - Me too !
Calm down, let me talk!
-I eat her heart in the middle to bread. - My hands are itchy.
In Amalfi a guy took the liberty to discredit the bus.
- Whoever touches the bus is like you if he touched it to me. - Me too.
I eat his heart in the middle of the bread!
Licorice, enough, you've been eating hearts for half an hour.
Don Arcà, you just have to tell us what we have to do.
Nothing serious, just a little thing. A beginner's job.
You have to explode the bus to that bastard
as if it were a tric-trac, a beautiful bomb!
- When does this have to be? -Tonight herself.
This evening ? The trouble that tonight I have my brother-in-law for dinner.
You know very well that my wife he won't let me go out in the evening.
You know her.
Don Arcà, it couldn't be done calmly? Tomorrow, the day after tomorrow?
No, I have Confirmation tomorrow of my nephew!
-You are right! - How do you do it?
You guys are made of cardboard!
This is refusal of obedience!
You wanted to eat into his heart, your hands were itching...
You disgust me! I'm leaving, but remember
that I have documents that can help you send everyone to jail!
I want to destroy you! Die Samson with all the Philistines!
- Let's think calmly. - Decide!
Or you destroy his bus or I'll send you to jail. In jail!
All right, let's destroy the bus.
Okay, you will find the bus to the Sorrento viewpoint.
There will be an idiot nearby who plays the guitar.
The bus for tonight it must be destroyed.
Pulverized, I don't have to see him anymore!
I said !
So we arrived to Christmas medicine.
Better to stop.
According to how you feel.
Maybe we overdid it.
Better, so you can get married without risk of relapses.
If it happens to you again sooner of marriage, I'm always here.
The trouble would be if it happened to you later.
Because this type of disease a more precise name is given.
Have you ever heard of it of anemesis?
I generally mind my own business.
It's the hand of destiny.
If fate made you fall in love of a boy...
let's even say a little ignorant, but that he was your type.
Would you rebel against this fate?
On the eve of my wedding... he should love me very much.
If he wanted you all the good in the world?
He would go to my father and ask him to marry me.
Then you want a funeral, not a wedding.
- He doesn't know my father, he's a man who speaks, speaks ...-And then he shoots.
It is not true.
If this guy had lost his head.
If he was ready for anything, less that of getting shot.
If he told the girl about him, if I love you, she'll run away with me tonight.
We'll tell dad after we get married.
This guy doesn't think so I can expose myself to a scandal!
You prefer to give up everything for afraid of a chat?
I prefer those who have courage. She doesn't love me enough!
He's my worst enemy!
I cannot go to my enemy to ask for his daughter's hand!
I don't run away with my father's worst enemy!
- Then marry the baronet and don't bother me anymore! - Certain !
You deserve that! It matters to you just save face!
I don't want someone like you!
The 17th in the 31st! Not even once!
Wait a minute, where are you going? Have patience!
These are the spas where the Ancient Romans bathed.
- In the woods next door they dried us. - We have to leave.
Wait a minute, there's still time.
Go and see. Maybe it's still there some ancient Roman.
Pasqualino, I can't do anything here.
You have to hurry, otherwise what do I do with these people?
- Calm down, let's leave immediately. - By what means?
You have paid and you have the duty to see and know everything.
At this point Ulysses met the sirens.
Some beautiful Amalfi mermaids.
And there they sang him a song done like this.
Here we are, the idiot singing is the one over there.
That must be the bus.
Unfortunately, fate has chosen you two, I envy you.
- You were lucky. - Congratulations !
Now...
Let's decide who gets the high honor to blow up the bus.
To you, you are the eldest.
No, Nicolì, let it never be said.
I don't want to abuse at all of my seniority.
The high honor, Nicolì, I give it to you.
- Gaetà, I would never allow it. - Do you want to offend me?
- Do you want to humiliate me? - All right.
It means that the high hon we take it half for one.
We divide the tasks between us.
Now... listen to me carefully.
While I'm from here I watch the street.
You approach the bus with the bomb in his hand.
Then, while I
I throw around some inquiring glances...
You skillfully introduce it in the bus.
And finally, while I...
to avoid attracting attention I will assume an indifferent air,
you blow up the bus and run away.
Go. In my name.
On behalf of San Gennaro!
Tourists are gunshots They're gone!
At this point Ulysses met of the Amalfi mermaids.
Have I already told you?
Then I will sing to you a Neapolitan song.
Help, the earthquake! Run away! Run away!
-How did it go? -You see, she would be...
- Would be ? - You speak.
Don Arcà, since... you speak.
Everything's fine, there's just a little particular.
I don't care about the details, let's get to the point.
- Did you destroy the bus? - Extremely destroyed.
- Except there's a little one particular. - I am not interested.
Have you damaged the engine?
Very troubled, a pile of wreckage.
- There is a small detail. - I am not interested.
- Did you cut the seats apart? - Destroyed.
- | How are the glasses? - Pulverized.
- There is a small detail. - You're annoying, what is it?
You see, out of a bizarre will of the case...
- By coincidence. - Due to a regrettable misunderstanding.
The bus that blew up, Don Arcà, don't get angry,
he was yours.
I don't get angry? Was the bus mine?
It was mine and you destroyed it.
I am destroyed, I break you Face it to all four!
Get out of my house! I don't want to see you anymore!
- Traitors! - Dad, what happened?
- They sabotaged me. - Calm down.
They sabotaged my bus!
- They destroyed it! - They ?
No, that's my business! It's guilt of that wretched Improta!
- Is he involved too? - That always hits!
It's my misfortune, my curse!
It's my bad omen!
- Dad, do you want revenge? - How?
Blame it on Toto Improta. Alone he might be interested.
- So you can report it. - Of course, if I report it...
Yes ! Do you know you're right?
You are a great lawyer, I have to see you in the assize court!
I want to see him in jail!
I'll send him to jail as a wedding gift.
-Carmela where is she? She speaks! - The thing...
- Don't stall!
In the black room... where I am those gentlemen dressed in black.
- Who? speaks ! - | carabinieri.
- You're going crazy! - The court!
- They arrested Carmela! - Rich people!
What do you want?
Criminal proceedings against by Improta Antonio as per column.
- Get up. - I'm not paralytic!
- Do you have anything else to say? - Yes.
If I find the stinker who made me this joke,
the prison I really earn it.
Silence ! Remember who you are in a courtroom.
- Who is your lawyer? - I don't have money, I can't spend.
It's me !
President, gentlemen, I will assume the defense of the accused.
No, she is the prosecution's daughter, I don't want it.
- The defendant doesn't want it. -The accused never knows what he wants.
- I want to be left alone. - Can I speak to the accused?
Go ahead.
- I was the one who arrested her. - Are you telling me like this?
It was the only way to make her see reason, Enough now or I'll send you to jail.
Your Honor, the defendant accepts me as patron, right?
If she says so! I have to here anyway end up in jail!
Silence !
- Still Miss or already Mrs. - I'm here as a lawyer.
- In a wedding dress. - Excuse me.
Please.
So it's okay. It suits you too!
Lawyer, take a seat. The word to the public prosecution.
Mr President, gentlemen...
Wait a minute, the public prosecution you have to forgive me,
Maybe I can save them some money time and effort,
- The procedure must be respected. - Sure, but...
Mr President, gentlemen!
I'm the only person who can to be able to affirm
with full awareness of the facts that Antonio Improta is innocent.
We don't need words, but of facts, of proof!
Naturally and she will have both.
I am precisely here to demonstrate to you that the accused was a victim
of a plotted plot against him in revenge.
- Lawyer, we need the facts! - You have to let her talk!
- Be quiet! - Silence is yours!
I defend the young lady who has to defend me.
- Silence ! - Right.
It's not education always interrupt.
You must be silent!
Everyone's talking and I'm taking a risk should I keep quiet in prison?
- Lawyer, finish quickly. - Right away.
Antonio Improta is a victim of revenge for someone he has offended.
Of someone he hurt in pride.
Your honor, ask the defense not to express oneself in riddles.
Who would this mysterious man be? character ?
Lawyer, be explicit, who is he?
Gentlemen of the court, if the bus was destroyed,
it's the ghost's fault.
Did you say a ghost?
Not a ghost, the ghost! Everyone in Amalfi knows him!
It is true ! Toto saw it first! Toto, what was he like?
He was all toothless.
Silence !
Your Honor, I understand and justify his surprise,
but I just have to confirm what I said.
So we both end up to the mental hospital.
- I object. - Forget about it.
It's ridiculous! The defense demands that we incriminate a ghost?
Why not, if he's guilty!
Or maybe he prefers send an innocent person to prison?
Lawyer, you won't need to convince us of the existence of ghosts!
The law does not allow than in a courtroom
silly superstitions come in southern.
Let's not start offending the southerners!
Remember that Benedetto Croce it was southern.
-But he certainly didn't believe in ghosts! - We don't know!
If he didn't believe in ghosts was it northern?
Do you believe it?
I do not ! But I'm Southern like Benedetto Croce!
Lawyer... where is he? Lawyer, let's move forward with this cause.
- Were you talking about the ghost? - Mi I will limit myself to stating the facts.
With the permission of this court, I call to the witness stand
Assunta Lo Bianco.
Assunta Lo Bianco, she knows that hers Is the deposition under oath?
Yes.
- She works at the counter Amalfi lot? - Yes.
After the latest events registered in the country,
how many people came to play from her ambi, terni, quaterne
all focused on numbers of the ghost?
- Everyone, even the judge. - What do I have to do with it?
I oppose it!
Assunta, this gentleman did he come to play the lottery?
-Yes, he always plays 8, 17, 60. - In the minutes!
What do you care about?
- You, shut up! - Right.
-Go back to his place right away. - I'm helping you!
- What numbers? - 8, 17, 60.
Your Honor, I ask that you results of this interrogation
be recorded in the minutes.
If an entire community, including the most illustrious representatives
believes in the existence of the ghost,
must also believe that this ghost
is capable of committing a crime.
Absurdly admitted that the ghost exists,
where he wants to go our learned colleague?
- To the truth - Stop everyone
Mr President, listen to me carefully! Get my daughter out now.
There are no daughters here, there are only lawyers.
Then let the lawyer out that her husband is waiting for her!
- Let's hurry up for the misery! - Moderate the deadlines!
-I ask that he be put on record. - I object!
He always opposes! I'm leaving now!
Why in the minutes? - Because it shows Di Capua's violent character.
So?
- Every action of the ghost is a cause of that character. - Is he medium?
-No, he is related to the ghost. - Then why don't you say it?
- Admit the kinship with the ghost? - What relationship?
For ghost do you mean the deceased dead?
There is a large kinship with them!
I have seven or eight uncles, four grandparents, three grandchildren.
- Why should I have opposed it? - Why oppose a ghost?
- It's absurd! - Instead there I will prove that it is very logical!
- I ask to be allowed to question the accused. - Granted.
- What should I say? - The truth. Courage.
Improta Antonio, do you want to marry...
You swear to tell the whole truth truth, nothing but the truth?
- Word of honor. - Say: I swear.
- Doesn't my word of honor count? - No.
- Come on, you swear. - It's okay, I swear.
- By your rule, I never tell lies. - Yes, sit down.
Sit down, I'm not tired.
It is true that you have seen it several times the ghost
weaving one more love relationship with the same?
- Let's not touch this button. - Yes or no?
Well, really me...
That's enough! It seems pointless to me to continue.
We find ourselves faced with a desperate man attempt to save the culprit.
Which culprit? Your Honor, I know the ghost!
- Silence ! - Shut up, ignorant people!
Silence !
You not only know the ghost,
but also intertwined relationships loving with them.
- Your honor, I swore. - In the minutes.
- I'm going crazy! - Me too !
I object. If we continue, he will tell us who spent the night together.
No! Not this!
When the ghost came to sleep in my bed,
- I, like a gentleman, went to sleep on the chair. - But listen to it!
Be quiet, be patient.
- What was the ghost like? - In what sense ?
Your Honor, it was a beautiful ghost. Take my word for it.
-He won't believe those lies? - I want to know the truth!
What truth? Now he will tell us that she regrets not marrying him!
Now yes. I have to confess.
On record!
Your honor, this is what marriage is about than Di Capua
he tried to prevent with his arrogance.
I didn't prevent anything.
Then he would accept that the ghost marries the accused?
I'm not interested in a wedding with a ghost.
If he likes it, the whole cemetery gets married.
- In the minutes! - Silence, I'm telling you this.
I was saying it for you. - I ask you to ask end to this ridiculous farce.
In the guise of the ghost, yes hides a living person, who is it?
I oppose it! It's my business private, I can't say.
I appreciate the delicacy of the accused, but I cannot remain silent.
Gentlemen of the court, I'm the ghost.
Then she's the culprit!
Yes, I'm to blame for everything. I am ready to suffer the consequences.
- Why did you do it? - I wanted to cause a scandal!
It was the only way to force these two arrogant men
to face judgement of public opinion.
Without a scandal I would never be managed to convince them
to abandon their rivalries.
And to consider that love it is above everything.
Now I'm in front of people intelligent, evolved,
like you, Mr. President and how you, Mr. Public Prosecutor.
I am in your hands. If you find me guilty,
how he considers me guilty the most retrograde part
of public opinion, So, condemn me!
It will mean that this condemnation it will serve as a warning to all girls
who are forced to love to play ghosts.
Then condemn me too, but first I want to marry the lawyer!
I oppose it! There is a scam here, a scam!
I give cause to this criminal and then I'll make him marry my daughter!
- Mr. thing... - Nice figure!
- What do you call it? - I won't tell you!
Honorable, I ask that the case be reopened.
No, the case is closed. The culprit confessed
and consider the reasons which led her to act
against her paternal property, she is acquitted due to self-defense.
And considering the powers that the law gives us,
we condemn Antonio Improta as an instigator
and therefore we give it our all of the punishment.
The first right thing! Condemned, condemned! How much?
Marriage for life!
- Lawyer, I love you! - Me too !
Wait a minute, I don't accept.
My daughter is already promised to another, the husband has it.
- Can I say something? - Say it!
- I can't marry Carmela of Capua. - Have you gone crazy?
Silence or I'll have you arrested.
I can't marry Carmela Di Capua why
I'm already tied to another woman.
- How? - Mom, either Assunta or death.
- Death! - Silence !
Miss Bice, I'm in England I have an uncle who is a cook.
Really ?
- Mom, either Assunta or death! - Let's talk about it at home!
Silence ! Silence !
Don Arcangelo, give consent to the wedding.
Otherwise I'm forced to continue and find the culprit.
The real one, Don Arcangelo!
Okay, I agree, but with regret!
So best wishes to everyone. The hearing is adjourned.
- One moment. - What else is there?
I give my consent, but on only one condition.
The defendant must sell me that damn bus.
- Are we at a fair? - You don't know that.
- It's a whim I owe myself remove. - Take it off, but quickly.
It's useless now, dad. We are family.
Yes, but I must be the master! I'm the only one in charge in the family.
All right, take it.
Swear it! Swear it in front of the court!
I swear! Finish with the bus and let's start with the father-in-law?
The bus is mine! He's mine!
I have some doubts.
I want to see Don Arcangelo! This time we hit the mark!
- This is your stuff! - What did you do?
Don Arcangelo, let's go to jail, but with your head held high!
Don Arcà, your honor is safe.
Don Arcà, we saved face!
Your enemy's bus we destroyed it!
Wretches! What have you done to me!
They brought me souvenirs!